Wednesday, March 21, 2012

How do u know....

I think the hardest thing about being an adult , mother, gf,daughter etc is noone gives u a manual with the dos and don't of raising kids, having and surviving relationships. There seems to be No real answer it's all trial and error. Learning more about yourself and the ins and outs of what works for you. But for all the judgement that is placed by society you would think some sort of manual would have been written.
How do you know in a friendship or relationship to throw in the towel? Not meaning give up but just stop exhausting yourself and this excludes my children b.c I believe that is the one area you never give up on. I want so much for my kids. I want Alyssa to grow up and be a good person with morals and the mOotivation to go against the grain. To know that she can be anything she wants to be but When you look at things like life and the different paths one can take....the bigger picture can be very overwhelming and for children it can be discouraging.
Life is full of knock you Downs and people judging you and not liking you and prolly even talking smack about u and then being nice to your face. Hardest part I feel when raising kids is the pick yourself up and keep trying part. Kids Psyche is so fragile esp young girls. Self image issues low self esteem and bullying. Our children are like sponges and although they look at us as role models and learn from our actions life isn't perfect and children see and hear things they shouldn't and such things can aide in damaging a children emotionally. All you can do is trying your best to explain to them why certain things happen in life and that life sucks that way. Life is tough and as a child you think when something goes wrong your life is over. That's where we step in and encourage them to be the bigger better person.
It's so hard for my daughter to understand why things are t he way they are and why you can't just go back and change things back to the way they once were.
50% nature 50% nurture.

I take things day by day b.c you never know what's to come. We are not guaranteed tomorrow.
Relationships are another thing. You have to be careful b.c your actions directly affect your children whether u think they are too young to notice or they don't hear conversations or argument but they do. Kids sense tension and whether they tell you now or later on down the road they know what is going on more than you would think. My oldest is almost 12 and it amazes me what a memory she has.
Showing your children by example what is acceptable and what is not.

My biggest challenge is helping my daughter know and be able to judge properly. Pick your friends wisely b.c even the friends you truly feel is your best friend...your person all too often you realize they were fake to you the whole time. Don't hang with people that don't have ur best interest at heart. Don't befriend someone who spends their free time talking bad about others b.c more so then not they have dogged you out more than once. There is always going to be situations you don't like and people u would like to forget but to survive life you must put it all aside and keep on going. Giving up on life isn't an option.

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